Tell me the name of this place isn't a fuckin' paradox.
I'm about to let it fly, so, yeah, there's your warning.
Goddammit. I'd love to just choke the fuck out of George Bush. I'd like to get him out in a cattle field and chase his little punk-ass around with a rope and, every thirty seconds or so, wrangle him, tie up his legs like a calf, and beat his ass to a bloody pulp—untie him, and do it all again. Punk bitch.
"One of the things that's very important is, when we debate this issue [issuing a government-recognized "National Anthem" is Spanish], that we not lose our national soul," the president exclaimed. "One of the great things about America is that we've been able to take people from all walks of life bound as one nation under God. And that's the challenge ahead of us."
"People from all walks of life" don't want to be under your God, you hillbilly fuck. Oh, but it gets worse. ...
"When the president was asked at a Rose Garden question-and-answer session whether the anthem should be sung in Spanish, he replied: 'I think the national anthem ought to be sung in English, and I think people who want to be a citizen of this country ought to learn English and they ought to learn to sing the national anthem in English.'"
You smug, illiterate son of a bitch. What the fuck makes you think YOU can speak English? Jorjay that busses tables at Applebee's speaks better English than you—and he only knows how to ask for weed. Get over here, Dubya, I'm gon' git you.
Me: "Yo, Georgie-boy, bring your panzy-ass over here. Good boy. Now, sit. Good, Georgie! Here's a glass of oil for being such a good boy."
Bush: "Thank you, Daddy. Did you hear what I said at the Rose Garden? I pretty much said, 'If you can't speak English, then get the fuck out of America!'"
Me: "And you feel better about yourself for saying that?"
Bush: "Well, I suppose. I don't know. Why do you ask me questions like that? You know they confuse me. ... Gettin' all philosoppical on me."
Me: "It's philosophical, shit-for-brains. You know that makes you sound like an arrogant, ignorant American who demands that everyone in the world conform to your way of life. You know shit like what you said is what makes the rest of the world hate us, right? The only fucking people who will agree with you is your goddamn kinfolk in incestial-breeding-gound, barefoot-beatin', goat-fuckin' Texas. Goddammit, George, what am I gonna do with you?"
Bush: "Will you say that again? You lost me at phila... philo...phi—"
Me: "Philosophical, you moronic cum-dumpster. That's it."
Then I commenced to kicking his ass with his own belt. Have a nice day. And weekend. I'll be visiting my three-story mansion on the Jersey shore. No, really. I swear. Bitch. Why don't you believe me? Ah, fuck off.