Equal or better

Hot damn! I'm on TeeVee!
To: You
From: Guess
Date: Duh
Subject: [Insert 30 seconds of thinking up a vapid subject line.]

OK, listen up, God. I know I don't believe in you, but if you do exist, will you please tell me why the fuck you created George W. Bush? Please. I'm begging, and I don't beg, except for sex but that's another story. Huh? Part of your plan? Ahhhh, blow me.

"Bush: Levees to be 'equal or better.'" Equal? That's real smuckin' fart George. I can hear Ralph Nagin now: "Uh, Mr., uh, President. Well, I mean, if they are gonna be, uh, equal, then, uh, won't they still, uh, collapse?"

Bush: "Listen here, Ralphie-boy. In the world of politics, I am daddy. And you know what? Daddy is gonna do and say what he wants to. Mmkay? So shut up. Bitch."

Nagin: "Sir, yes, sir."

Laura Bush: "George! Fix your pants. What the fuck, are you waiting for a goddamn flood?"

Bush: "Laura, why do you always do this in front of people?! Gah. ... Is that better?"

Laura: "Yes, that's better. And, ah, don't ever raise your voice at me again. I will kick you out again, and judging from the way you came back last time, I'm guessing you don't wanna go stay with Dick again, do you?"

Bush: "If I have to sleep on the street, I don't care. I will never stay at Dick's house again. I told you what he did to me. I still have nightmares about him. You know he doesn't wear underwear, right?"

Laura: "Neither do I and you don't seem to have a fuckin' problem with it."

Bush: "Yeah, but your balls aren't bulging out either."

Laura: "'Nuff said."

... Yeah, George. Go ahead and piss away our money to build levees that will, yet again, fail the city and take the lives of even more people. That makes about as much sense as a blind and deaf tour guide. Idiot.


Anonymous said...

You are fucking hilarious.... it's nice to have something entertaining to read at work

-friend of chas

Don Elkins said...

The pic in and of itself is worth the read...jeez, who shot that thing, and has Bush tried to send that person to Guantanamo? Funny stuff...keep goin. It's a great read.